• estimated fifty-five kilometres of walking;
• unpredictable weather;
• and the slightly out-of-date pitta bread for lunch (oops).

But I do have various factors on my side, such as:

• Dave the legendary instructor;
• Mr T, who probably pities the foo's who can't do six-figure grid references;
• Six good mates for walking with;
• Food;
• A tent (presumed waterproof);
• KENDAL MINT CAKE (cheers for the tip, Marcus Brigstocke)

Previous expedition veterans have related gripping yarns of fields of bulls, plantations littered with bear traps, horrific instances of moving off the side of the OS map, and further tales. But I'm not too worried. After all, it is the South Downs, and we are rather unlikely to run into a big scary bear. After all, we're nowhere near Brighton.

I finally have a decent excuse to wear a gigantic broad-brimmed hat, which should be useful in keeping the sun off my face, but may also cause a minor eclipse within a three-mile radius. Given how I should be even thinner by the end of Day 3, an eventual picture of this intrepid explorer should resemble the mushroom below:

Now to start winding stuff down ready for tomorrow afternoon's start. Onwards, into the wild blue yonder!